It’s A Rapoff !

DJ  AFC and MC J-League In the not too distant near future the suits at the Premier League have their way and now every EPL match is played abroad. But the effect is felt on the local economies of some American cities after they fielded some of the matches.

Boston never recovered from hosting Wigan v Sunderland.
Atlanta was financially crippled after they got Reading v Birmingham and then West Ham v Middlesboro.

At first the impact of the league was instantaneous.
American soccer fans embraced this new craze and after studying the newly franchised BBC archives, they took to emulating their English counterparts with full vigour. In fact it became an obsession. They studied everything. Including the music.

Hoards of replica shirt wearing chav homies roamed the streets looking for some “bovver”. (Even though they didn’t know what it was. Some thought it was the half-time Bovril, others thought it was a new dance).

But eventually this new obsession ate into the culture and left some places in ruins. – There were only matches once every other week and none in the summer. What were they going to do the rest of the time ? What are they going to do with all these pies..?

[SCENE]: An trash filled alley somewhere in Chicago.

A gang of red shirted, baseball cap wearing footie/gangstas enter from one end. They wear an emblem of an 18th century cannon.

From the opposite end of the alley others enter. They are wearing red shiny shell suits with stripes of white down each side. Their emblem is a fabled bird with something in it’s mouth.

The two groups meet in the middle and stare each other down. A kid separates from one of the posse struggling with an 80’s style boombox. He sets on an abandoned car and waits…

Bob Fossil suddenly appears.           “Holy shitsauce we’ve got outselves a rapoff !”

First to step up is the 1988 Liverpool team including Alan Hansen, Jan Molby, Ray Houghton and Mark Lawrenson:

» Liverpool 1988 FA Cup Squad – Anfield Rap (Red Machine In Full Effect)

One nil Liverpool.

Looking for an equaliser is the A Team …

» The A Team – Arsenal Rap

The score is one-all.

Liverpool come back looking to take the lead again:

» Brize-E And The Anfield Posse – Anfield Rap

Ooh did it go over the line..? There’s an appeal… and it’s just given. Dodgy decision there.

It’s Arsenal on the counter attack, they want to level the scores again:

» Steven North and the Flat Back Four – Gus Caeser Rap

…and they smash one into the back of the net with that WTF moment.

With only seconds to go Liverpool are looking for the winner and…

» Liverpool FC – Anfield Rap (Red Machine Dub)

Ah but it’s ruled offside ! No goal !

Fossil blows the whistle for full time and it’s a draw. Neither side won this one. In fact it’s embarrassment all round.

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