Also does as it says on the tin.   »Previously

Preamble: I made an appeal via Twitter for some suggestions on songs done about obscure footballers and got an outstanding response. Thank you to everyone mentioned below. A special thanks also to @mirkobolesan for helping to get the word out.

⇒ Suggested by @DeadlyMonkfish:

Sean Thornton
SEAN THORNTON (from Drogheda, Ireland) is a professional footballer currently playing for Drogheda United. He made 11 appearances in the Premier League for Sunderland in the 2002–03 season and has made over 175 appearances in the Football League, mostly for Sunderland, Doncaster Rovers and Leyton Orient.

Sean became a bit of a cult hero when he was playing for Leyton Orient. In 2005-2006 season when Orient were promoted, Sean was caught on video in the dressing room doing a rap. Because of his status and of this moment, the band Steve White & The Protest Family recorded a song about him.

” Local folk-punk hero’s Steve White & The Protest Family who are rapidly acquiring a reputation as one of the best bands to come out of East London for a generation. With lots of swearing”

If the above Bandcamp doesn’t work:
» Steve White & The Protest Family – Sean Thornton
Additional note: The band also has a song called Brisbane Road.

 Obscurity Scale: 80/100 
A very high score because of the obscureness of the band, the type of music they play and the relative obscurity of the player.


⇒ Suggested by @_PrettyBoyFloyd:

Hansi Muller
HANSI MÜLLER is a former German football player and current football official. He played for VfB Stuttgart andInter Milan. He got 42 caps for Germany and scored and 5 goals. He won the 1980 European Championships.

There was a German punk band called Die Walter Elf. They were named after Kaiserslautern’s legendary team in the 50’s that featured Fritz Walter and his brother Ottmar. They performed a song in ‘tribute’ to the above footballer. They called it “Hansi Müllers Schniedelwutz” – which translates as “Hansi Müller’s willy”

 Obscurity Scale: 70/100 
Again a high score because of the band’s obscurity and another very tongue in cheek song.



⇒ This next one was suggested by the band themselves: La Lucha Libre.
They have a Mexican-type moniker and their gimmick is wearing the Mexican wrestler masks, but in fact they are from Brest, which is in northwestern corner of France. They contacted me via the F&M Facebook page to let me know they had a song about George Best. Not only that, they had another song about a footballer who plays for Ligue 2 side Stade Brestois 29 (commonly referred to as Stade Brest or simply: Brest)

Bruno Goughi BRUNO GROUGI born in Caen is a French attacking midfielder who has been playing for Stade Brest since 2009.

He has a great importance in the team Brest on and off the pitch. Lauded by the public and his coach Alex Dupont. Bruno Grougi became an iconic player for Stade Brestois 29.

In an article/review in L’Equipe by P.E. Minonzio, the band’s drummer Pierre-Yves Boussard explains:

…”We’re fans Stade Brestois and we love Grougi, a talented guy and accessible. We paid him tribute with this song, whose lyrics consist of names of the greatest players in the club’s history.”

They also got to meet him:

 Obscurity Scale: 90/100 
Near on perfection on the obscurity measurement for both band and player.


⇒ An excellent suggestion from @TimGradio:

Ingimarsson
ÍVAR INGIMARSSON is an Icelandic former professional footballer. He began his career in Iceland with Valur and ÍBV before moving to England where, after an initial loan spell with Torquay United, he joined Brentford, making over 100 appearances. He moved to Reading in 2003, spending the next eight years with club and amassing 281 appearances before ending his career with a short spell at Ipswich Town.

At international level Ívar represented Iceland at under-17, under-19 and under-21 level before making his senior debut in 1998. After thirty appearances he retired from international football in 2007.

While at Brentford, the band The Bluetones named one of their instrumental B-sides in his honour. Adam Devlin, the guitarist, is a Bees fan.
As Tim said in his tweet: “…A fabulously unfussy instrumental – similar to the man himself.”

» The Bluetones – Ingimarsson

 Obscurity Scale: 70/100 
A slightly lower mark because the band are well known and the footballer, not as much.

+ Added the video for Marblehead Johnson because of Mark Morriss wearing a Liverpool shirt.


⇒ Next up is this suggestion by @EmlynBegley:

Jamie Cook JAMIE COOK is an English footballer who plays for Oxford City.
Cook started his career with his hometown club Oxford United, where he played 77 times in the Football League, scoring seven goals. He then joined Boston United, where he was a part of the team that beat Dagenham & Redbridge to the Conference title that season. The midfielder then had spells at Stevenage, Bath City, Witney United, Rushden & Diamonds and Crawley Town.

In 2012 he went back to Oxford United for £5000 in a transfer funded by Oxford fans, with Crawley desperate to reduce their wage bill due to financial difficulties.

Emlyn tells me that the musician Gavin Osborn wrote this one after he signed Jamie Cook in his Championship Manager game. – The man himself explains and introduces the song:

And the song:

 Obscurity Scale: ??/100 
Now here’s a dilemma. There are points for relative singer obscurity. Gavin Osborn sings about a footballer, but… a fictional computer game version of him. So I’ve no idea how to score this one.


⇒ Last one for now, a brilliant suggestion by @MrNipps:

Lloyd Owusu LLOYD OWUSU is a retired professional footballer. After a move from non-League Slough Town, his career took off at Brentford, where he scored 64 goals in 163 league games between 1998 and 2002. He then moved to Sheffield Wednesday, and two years later transferred to Reading following a short loan spell. He returned to Brentford in 2005, and two years later signed with Yeovil Town. In 2008, he moved to Cheltenham Town, and also had a loan spell at Brighton & Hove Albion the following year.

After this he had spells at Adelaide United, AEP Paphos, Luton Town, Barnet and Slough Town (again) before returning to Australia to play for White City and finally, Hakoah Sydney City East.

In his spare time Owusu is also a DJ.

– In 2006 when he was at Brentford the bassist for Status Quo wrote a song about him:

Brentford striker Lloyd Owusu is rockin’ all over the world after Status Quo’s bass player wrote a song for him.

The track, entitled Owusu The One And Only, has registered enough downloads from the club’s website to get it on to Top of the Pops, but unfortunately football sites are not recognised by the chart authorities.

Owusu, who rejoined Brentford from Reading in the close season, said: “The response has been unbelievable.

“If the same number of people had downloaded the song from a music site it would be in the top 20.”

“I’ve never been a Quo fan, I’m more into R&B and funky house – but John’s song is wicked.

“Most footballers have abuse chanted at them but not many have had songs written.”

Quo bassist John ‘Rhino’ Edwards, who wrote the rocking ditty, said: “I’ve been a Brentford fan for 42 years and it’s been brilliant to have Lloyd back. He plays his heart out.

» John “Rhino” Edwards – Owusu The One And Only

 Obscurity Scale: 75/100 
Slightly lower because the singer is from a well known band.


UPDATE:
⇒ A huge thank you to John for posting a comment below about this one just added:

George Petherbridge GEORGE PETHERBRIDGE (19 May 1927 – 4 March 2013) was a professional footballer, who played for Bristol Rovers for seventeen years, between 1945 and 1962. He played as a winger for the club and made 457 appearances in the Football League, and 496 in all competitions, scoring 85 league and seven cup goals.

Petherbridge Way in Bristol is named after Petherbridge. The road lies midway between Bristol Rovers’ former home at Eastville Stadium and their current ground, the Memorial Stadium.

– The musician John D Revelator penned this tribute to him:

‘A personal tribute to friend & Bristol Rovers Legend George “Winky Pop” Petherbridge who passed away in March. A proper old school footballer & one club man – google his record – they don’t make them like him anymore.’

 Obscurity Scale: 100/100 
Back of the net. A completly obscure footballer (outside of Bristol anyway) and unknown singer.

⇒ If you know of any other tunes about an obscure player post a comment below.

3 Replies to “Songs About Obscure Footballers”

  1. “Bob Wilson – Anchorman” by Half Man Half Biscuit
    or
    “1966 And All That” by the same band, mentions Ferenc Puskas.

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